Thinkings
TODAY i am so moody and my mind is lost. I am thinking about why they are like this? These days i heard bad news around me so, i am not happy. Is it my fault too much expecting from them. You know that ………. see now i am forgetting what i am writing about? It is signal of aging or speechless of shocking. You know that these days i try to learning new things to forget sadness inside me. I feel useless because i couldn’t help and protect them from nightmare. At work some of my team members was attacked by cyber bully and they assumed that the culprit is someone in our office or our ex-workers. I really want to help them but i couldn’t. God please give me power to protect my friends. Yesterday is the worst day for me, in facebook some new feed pop up and i saw a person post about his status which is not good. I have some suspicious about his personality but when i asked him about it his reply was no. But according to his yesterday’s post i clearly saw his real self. I don’t want to accept it but must accept it. I am thinking about why is he like that? What things change him? Actually there is no answer for me. Honestly i admit that i am really shock about it. His family is away from him and only he left in this country. So, he can do whatever he like. I know that he has financial issue/difficulties. Money changed him to devil from a young innocent person? I have so many questions in my mind Why? Why? Why?
I would like to ask him why he changed a lot these years? When i first met him at drawing class ,he is an university student and he is smart and kind. After that we haven’t seen each other long time. At 2020, i tried to contact him with to meet up then, we met at the plaza and we speak about our past and struggling. Then, Second time we met at the shopping centre. After that Covid and coup happened we haven’t meet each other. But we have contact via messenger. I am the one who talkative in the message he barley replied my message. He post often his status in facebook and all post is about drinking at bars. One strange thing is he never post who he is with. I am praying that his friend is to be a girl not a boy. You know that i am conventional or traditional whatever you think, i don’t like boy like boy. It is really interrogate to me. But my prayer is not come true. Based on his yesterday fb post he showed his really personality and seem that he is happy with them.
Accidentally at my work some boys are interested on boys, they couldn’t hide their feelings at office. If they love each other too much, do love at outside, don’t bring it on office. Office is the place to work, not the place to date. Am i too selfish to think like that? I believe that you will agree my point.
By the way i am attending online photoshop class and i really upset about one thing is the lecture absent so many times that make me less interested on it.
Au revior, A bientot!
mynameisthelakehouse 